The Joy of Death started in the winter of 1886 with the death of William Fraser Tolmie, noted surgeon and politician. Upon reviewing the corpse, Dr. Harold Eads was heard to mutter a mild retort, jesting that the pungent odor of Mr. Tolmie's decomposing body was most likely attributed to his massive consumption of cheese (for which he was well known). The callowness and blatant disregard for the timeliness of Mr. Tolmie's passing outraged his widow and remained a black mark on Dr. Eads' otherwise noteworthy reputation.
One-hundred-twenty years later this bloge was founded, thrived, and burned to the ground. Two years after that it was re-established with the demise of Don LaFontaine. And since that time, The Joy of Death has been determined to carry on the spirit of Dr. Harold Eads, denouncing and mocking the recently receased.
The Over/Under
Determined my decades of science and stolen from a Wikipedia article, the given life expectancy of any individual is roughly around eighty years. There is some natural variation depending on country of birth, residence, sex, and various other factors, but eighty seemed like a pretty easy number to remember. This is, in essence, the over/under on human existence, and as such all deaths are measured not in actual age, but age until/surpassing that important eighty-year mark. So someone who lives to be 97 would actually be +17, while someone who passed away at the age of 6 would be an impressive -74. Good going, kid.
The Tallies
Two separate tallies have been established in order to track man and woman's glorious battle against the Reaper. The first is the under/over, wherein all life exterminated after the age of eighty gives bonus points for humanity. Conversely, all life exterminated before the age of eight takes away points. At the end of time whichever side has the most points, humanity or Death, wins.
The other tally tracks the departed's religious affiliation. This way we can see how many of each unique and separate Deity's chosen children have been taken. Again, whichever major religion has the most tally points at the end of time wins. When religious affiliation is either unknown or dual, we make one up.
The Jackpot
Any reference to "The Jackpot" is slang for Heath Ledger, whose death was unfortunately before the time of The Joy of Death and thus not documented in our annals. While we are sad that we missed the opportunity to trivialize his legacy, we remained confident that another, younger, equally talented actor will meet their demise shortly.
A Note on Pronunciation
The proper "blog" is always noticeable pronounced "bloge" due to a speech impediment of mine.
Submissions
If you know of a recently deceased whose passing you'd like trivialized, feel free to contact us and we'll do our best to be of assistance.
